I Wrote this While Watching House on DVD

The Trailer Park Boys Movie featured a major new character: Sonny, owner of the nearby Gentlemen’s Club. The Simpsons Movie introduced Russ Cargill of the Environmental Protection Agency, who appeared far too frequently. These prominent characters could have been replaced easily (Cyrus and Ten-Gallon Hat Man are two possibilities) and should have been excised from the films because they fell flat in their roles (whether furthering the plot or attempting to make a joke.)

When asked to explain his team’s recent success on the road (five points in three games), Alexei Kovalev said that, “On the road, [the Montreal Canadiens] seem to play more relaxed and kind of play the game with nothing to lose. When we come back home, we try to overdue things. We try to do a little bit extra because family is in the building, and friends and all of our fans.”

The Habs return to the Bell Centre on Thursday to play the Lighting, a team they recently defeated 5-2 in Tampa. What can the Canadiens do to ensure a win and avoid disappointment?

Sport is fundamentally simple: the body repeats a number of actions. It becomes more complicated when the mind interferes, building mountains out of molehills. Certainly, we wouldn’t enjoy the game at the highest levels if it was played like a 6:00am house league game but the trick lies in resisting the temptation to harm ourselves; the opponent proves more than eager to complete that task. Whether at Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital or on the ice, one must focus on what one does best.

The Detroit Pistons would be foolish to abandon the Circle Play for the playoffs. Jamario Moon would be equally rash to think that he should match Ray Allen shot for shot. The University of Western Ontario seemed to run only one continuity set (baseline screens, deftly performed) to win Ryerson’s DeArmon Memorial Tournament.

Why do players and team want to make it more difficult for themselves? Everyone has the freedom to choose how they want to perform. It’s up to coaches to motivate players, creating needs and wants, so they perform optimally.

Guy Carbonneau, Montreal’s coach, should put his foot down (and make Kerry Price the number one goalie, Ken Dryden style) and make things simpler for his team, using video, practical examples in practice, or a frank talk. Kovalev’s comments are a cop-out, a mere excuse. If players truly feel that way, the coach isn’t doing his job.

Little Things Make All the Difference

Recalling the time when Homer made a bookshelf out of four planks and six cinder blocks:

Marge: Homer, we have a perfectly good bookcase.
Homer: Yeah, but this is what they’re doing on campus. Besides, it isn’t costing us: I swiped the cinderblocks from a construction site.

Meanwhile, at the construction site:

Worker: Sir, six cinderblocks are missing.
Boss: There’ll be no hospital, then. I’ll tell the children.

Neither passing nor cutting are what they used to be and motion offences are suffering as a result. But there’s a nice bookcase next to the bench by the pick-up court.